[17] And if he refuses to hear them, tell it to the church. But if he refuses even to hear the church, let him be to you like a heathen and a tax collector.
The church as we think of it was not yet in existence when Jesus said this, so his disciples would not have understood it to mean a church gathering or an institutional church. The Greek word for church, ekklessia, means congregation, and was also used in the Old Testament to describe the kingdom of Israel. The disciples would have probably understood "church" to be the Jewish community, or maybe a rabbi or the synagogue.
"Church" is used only one other time in the Gospels:
Matthew 16:18 NKJV
[18] And I also say to you that you are Peter, and on this rock I will build My church, and the gates of Hades shall not prevail against it.
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Matthew 18:32-35 NKJV
[32] Then his master, after he had called him, said to him, ‘You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you begged me. [33] Should you not also have had compassion on your fellow servant, just as I had pity on you?’ [34] And his master was angry, and delivered him to the torturers until he should pay all that was due to him.
[35] “So My heavenly Father also will do to you if each of you, from his heart, does not forgive his brother his trespasses.”
Jesus's promise in verses 34 and 35 is a hard pill to swallow, but it shows how seriously God takes forgiveness. This is a parable about the Kingdom of God, and forgiveness of one another is required of those who are in his Kingdom because he forgave us.
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Matthew 19:3-6 NKJV
[3] The Pharisees also came to Him, testing Him, and saying to Him, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason?” [4] And He answered and said to them, “Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning ‘made them male and female,’ [5] and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? [6] So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.”
Since a man has been joined to his wife, and the two have become one flesh, God has joined them together, and therefore man does not have the authority to separate (divorce) the two.
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Matthew 19:10-12 NKJV
[10] His disciples said to Him, “If such is the case of the man with his wife, it is better not to marry.” [11] But He said to them, “All cannot accept this saying, but only those to whom it has been given: [12] For there are eunuchs who were born thus from their mother’s womb, and there are eunuchs who were made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven’s sake. He who is able to accept it, let him accept it.”
Not all can go through life unmarried, but some can. Jesus uses the different conditions of eunuchs to explain why some are able to go through life unmarried because marriage was primarily intended for procreation - to "go forth and multiply."
A eunuch is not able to have children, and their sexual desire is very low. Even if they have sexual desires, they are not able to act on them. Like eunuchs, some people might not have the ability to have children, and some people have low sexual desires, and can go through life without having sex, and therefore they do not need to get married.
The disciples said, and Jesus agreed with them, that if one is able, it is better not to get married. Paul said the same thing. If someone is set on the Kingdom of God, and having children, and getting married are not important to them, and they have a low sexual desire and have self control, marriage will be a distraction that can deter them from the Kingdom of God. It is better for them not to marry but to build God's Kingdom.
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Matthew 19:16-21 NKJV
[16] Now behold, one came and said to Him, “Good Teacher, what good thing shall I do that I may have eternal life?” [17] So He said to him, “Why do you call Me good? No one is good but One, that is, God. But if you want to enter into life, keep the commandments.”
[18] He said to Him, “Which ones?” Jesus said, “‘You shall not murder,’ ‘You shall not commit adultery,’ ‘You shall not steal,’ ‘You shall not bear false witness,’ [19] ‘Honor your father and your mother,’ and, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ ”
[20] The young man said to Him, “All these things I have kept from my youth. What do I still lack?”
[21] Jesus said to him, “If you want to be perfect, go, sell what you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow Me.”
The commandments Jesus gave him to follow are life giving ("if you want to enter into life"). If you murder, steal, commit adultery, etc., you will not have the life that God created you for - you will not enter into life. You will be dead in your sins.
If you desire more than merely entering into life, and want to be perfect, you will store up treasure in heaven and follow Jesus.
Many people keep the commandments, even if they are not Christians. They do not murder, steal, commit adultery, etc. They might be "good" people, and live a good life, however, they might not be "perfect" by storing up treasure in heaven and following Jesus.
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Matthew 19:23-24 NKJV
[23] Then Jesus said to His disciples, “Assuredly, I say to you that it is hard for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven. [24] And again I say to you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God.”
The Kingdom of heaven and the Kingdom of God are synonymous.
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Matthew 19:27-30 NKJV
[27] Then Peter answered and said to Him, “See, we have left all and followed You. Therefore what shall we have?” [28] So Jesus said to them, “Assuredly I say to you, that in the regeneration, when the Son of Man sits on the throne of His glory, you who have followed Me will also sit on twelve thrones, judging the twelve tribes of Israel. [29] And everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or wife or children or lands, for My name’s sake, shall receive a hundredfold, and inherit eternal life. [30] But many who are first will be last, and the last first."
In the regeneration - the time after Christ has ascended to his throne, and one is born again by the Spirit- the twelve disciples would be given authority to reign with Christ, judging the twelve tribes of Israel. This may have already been fulfilled when Jesus gave them authority over the church as apostles. They were apostles to the Jews (Israel). James began his letter to the church, "To the twelve tribes which are scattered abroad...". The apostles' understanding of the Scriptures was opened, and they guided, directed, and protected the church. They judged what was and was not appropriate for the church. In a sense, they judged the twelve tribes of Israel.
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Whoever leaves behind his house, brothers, sisters, mother, father, wife, children, or lands to follow Jesus, will be blessed with many more - a hundredfold - as well as the inheritance of eternal life. Through the church, locally and globally, we receive many family members and items to use for Jesus and his Kingdom.
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Many who are first now, will be last in the Kingdom of God. Jesus told a parable of the Kingdom which describes how it operates:
Matthew 20:1-16 NKJV
[1] “For the kingdom of heaven is like a landowner who went out early in the morning to hire laborers for his vineyard. [2] Now when he had agreed with the laborers for a denarius a day, he sent them into his vineyard.
[3] And he went out about the third hour and saw others standing idle in the marketplace, [4] and said to them, ‘You also go into the vineyard, and whatever is right I will give you.’ So they went. [5] Again he went out about the sixth and the ninth hour, and did likewise. [6] And about the eleventh hour he went out and found others standing idle, and said to them, ‘Why have you been standing here idle all day?’
[7] They said to him, ‘Because no one hired us.’ He said to them, ‘You also go into the vineyard, and whatever is right you will receive.’
[8] “So when evening had come, the owner of the vineyard said to his steward, ‘Call the laborers and give them their wages, beginning with the last to the first.’
[9] And when those came who were hired about the eleventh hour, they each received a denarius. [10] But when the first came, they supposed that they would receive more; and they likewise received each a denarius. [11] And when they had received it, they complained against the landowner, [12] saying, ‘These last men have worked only one hour, and you made them equal to us who have borne the burden and the heat of the day.’
[13] But he answered one of them and said, ‘Friend, I am doing you no wrong. Did you not agree with me for a denarius? [14] Take what is yours and go your way. I wish to give to this last man the same as to you. [15] Is it not lawful for me to do what I wish with my own things? Or is your eye evil because I am good?’
[16] So the last will be first, and the first last. For many are called, but few chosen.”
Verse 16B is not in the NIV.
The landowner payed everyone what they agreed to be paid, which was the same amount whether they worked all day, or for only one hour. When the laborers complained that it was unfair, he asked them rhetorical questions to show them that they were wrong for thinking the way they were:
"Did you not agree with me for a denarius?"
"Is it not lawful for me to do what I wish with my own things? Or is your eye evil because I am good?"
God is the landowner, the owner of all things, and He can do what He wishes with His things. His ways are not our ways. Even if His ways seem unfair to us, He is good. But because His ways are not our ways, our ways sometimes seem right (good), while His ways seem wrong (evil). However, God never does wrong or evil, and our ways are never better than His. If we believe they are, then our eye is evil because He is good.
According to His ways, which are unlike our ways, the last will be first and the first will be last. We naturally want to exalt people of influence, and stature. People who have accumulated wealth, and have attained fame; people who are popular; celebrities; business owners; church and ministry leaders; people of success who have made their own way. But Jesus was a servant and God's people are also servants. Though they may be "last" by the world's standards, they are "first" by God's.
Many are called to follow Jesus and to inherit the Kingdom of God and eternal life, but few are chosen because they put themselves first. They lack being a servant, as well as faithfulness, commitment, and devotion to God.
I think, like many of his parables, this parable is about Jews and Gentiles. The Jews were invited to be God's people first, but shortly after Jesus said this parable, the Gentiles were going to be invited as well. The idea of Gentiles becoming God's people would be upsetting to the Jews. They would think that it was unfair because they had been God's people for a very long time, and now the Gentiles would be invited to work in the Kingdom and receive the same payment (inheritance) as they would, but for much less time and work than what they had put in.
When they grumbled about it, Jesus said to them that God can do whatever He wants to do because it all belongs to Him, and though it seems unfair to you, the way you are viewing it is evil compared to His way, which is good.
In this sense, "the first will be last", refers to the Jews who were given the first opportunity to have faith in Jesus and enter into and inherit the Kingdom of God, but rejected it by rejecting Jesus. Because of their rejection, the Gentiles would be given the opportunity to receive Jesus, and if they did, they would become first over the Jews by entering into and inheriting the Kingdom of God and eternal life.
"The last will be first" refers to the Gentiles who received Jesus when He came, and therefore were given the opportunity after the Jews (last) to enter into and inherit His Kingdom and eternal life that is only found in Him. Because of their faith in Jesus (that he was the Jew's Messiah and the Son of God), they would be first by entering and inheriting the Kingdom of God and eternal life.
In this context, I think that "Many are called, but few are chosen" means that the Jews were called to be God's own special treasure of people, His royal priesthood, His Kingdom of people, however, they rejected His offer because they did not believe in Jesus, and therefore they were not chosen to be as such.
Paul uses this idea of the Jews being "first" in Romans. He wrote that the Jews were the first to have the Gospel of salvation preached to them, before the Greeks (Gentiles), however, now it was also being preached to the Gentiles (1:16).
In 2:9, he wrote that God's wrath, tribulation, and anguish would come upon every soul who does evil, to the Jew first, and also to the Greek (Gentiles). Glory, honor, and peace will come upon everyone who works what is good, to the Jew first, and also to the Greeks (Gentiles).
Both Jew and Gentile will receive wrath, tribulation, and anguish for works of evil, or glory, honor, and peace for works of good, because there is no partiality with God. The Jews were first because they were given the first opportunity to believe in Jesus. God sent Jesus to call "the lost sheep of Israel" to repentance, however God planned all along to bring His other sheep into the fold.
There is a remnant of Israel (a few) who did have faith in Jesus when he came, and they were chosen to be among God's people. These few included, but are not limited to: Mary, Joseph, Zacharias, Elizabeth, Anna, Simeon, at least eleven of Jesus's disciples (Judas is not one of them), etc. These all believed that Jesus was the Messiah and/or the Son of God when he came. They did not deny him or reject him as many others did, but they immediately recognized who he was and believed in him when he came. They are of the remnant of Israel - the few who are chosen.
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