And the Lord God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.”
God did not think that it was good for man to be alone. Therefore, He created a partner/helper for him, from the man's own body.
Adam said: “This is now bone of my bones And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man.” Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. - Genesis 2:18, 23, 24
The Biblical meaning of man is the bone of bones, flesh of flesh of the woman; Woman’s perfect partner. The Biblical meaning of woman is the bone of bones, flesh of flesh of man; man’s perfect partner.
A man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife and become one flesh with her, sexually, spiritually, emotionally. This joining of the two is intended by God to be exclusively between a man and his wife, who are male and female.
God's Purpose for Marriage
Now Adam knew Eve his wife, and she conceived and bore Cain, and said, “I have acquired a man from the Lord.” - Genesis 4:1
So God blessed Noah and his sons, and said to them: “Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth... And as for you, be fruitful and multiply; Bring forth abundantly in the earth And multiply in it.” - Genesis 9:1, 7
Man was created with the ability to reproduce. God's purpose for marriage is for man, His people specifically, not the wicked, to multiply and fill the earth.
Ancient Marriage as Recorded in the Bible
There are possibly other cultural and historical customs that we are not told about in the Bible, such as marriage ceremonies, vows, etc. This list contains only the ways in which the Bible describes marriage.
So Sarai said to Abram, “See now, the Lord has restrained me from bearing children. Please, go in to my maid; perhaps I shall obtain children by her.” And Abram heeded the voice of Sarai. Then Sarai, Abram’s wife, took Hagar her maid, the Egyptian, and gave her to her husband Abram to be his wife, after Abram had dwelt ten years in the land of Canaan. - Genesis 16:2-3
Sarai gave Hagar to Abram to be his wife so that she can bear children through her. Hagar became his wife by "going into her".
Then Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah’s tent; and he took Rebekah and she became his wife, and he loved her. So Isaac was comforted after his mother’s death. - Genesis 24:67
Isaac took Rebekah as his wife in his mother’s tent . His mother was not present, but had recently died.
Now Jacob loved Rachel; so he said, “I will serve you seven years for Rachel your younger daughter.”
And Laban said, “It is better that I give her to you than that I should give her to another man. Stay with me.”
So Jacob served seven years for Rachel, and they seemed only a few days to him because of the love he had for her.
Then Jacob said to Laban, “Give me my wife, for my days are fulfilled, that I may go in to her.”
Now it came to pass in the evening, that he took Leah his daughter and brought her to Jacob; and he went in to her. And Laban gave his maid Zilpah to his daughter Leah as a maid.
So it came to pass in the morning, that behold, it was Leah. And he said to Laban, “What is this you have done to me? Was it not for Rachel that I served you? Why then have you deceived me?”
And Laban said, “It must not be done so in our country, to give the younger before the firstborn. Fulfill her week, and we will give you this one also for the service which you will serve with me still another seven years.”
Then Jacob did so and fulfilled her week. So he gave him his daughter Rachel as wife also. And Laban gave his maid Bilhah to his daughter Rachel as a maid.
Then Jacob also went in to Rachel, and he also loved Rachel more than Leah. And he served with Laban still another seven years. - Genesis 29:18-21, 23-30
Leah and Rachel were given as wives to Jacob by their father as payment for his work. Jacob loved Rachel and asked her father to give her to him, but her father deceived Jacob and gave him his oldest daughter , Leah, first. Jacob had to work for their father for seven years each.
So she said, “Here is my maid Bilhah; go in to her, and she will bear a child on my knees, that I also may have children by her.” Then she gave him Bilhah her maid as wife, and Jacob went in to her. - Genesis 30:3-4
Rachel gave her maid to be Jacob's wife so that he could go into her and give Rachel children.
When Leah saw that she had stopped bearing, she took Zilpah her maid and gave her to Jacob as wife. - Genesis 30:9
Leah gave her maid to be Jacob's wife so that he could go into her and give Leah children.
Jacob ended up having four wives, two of them being given to him by the two wives he already had. God used each of his wives to multiply the earth with his offspring.
***Note that Abram and Jacob and others in this ancient time period had more than one wife as well as concubines, and God did not judge them or punish them for it. He never commanded them that they could only have one wife, although that was and is His intention for marriage. However, God’s intention was also to fill the earth with His people, which was the reason that some men had more than one wife and *concubines. Wicked men may have had more than one wife for their own pleasure and selfish reasons, but righteous men sought to glorify God by doing His will.
God had promised that the Christ was going to come through Jacob’s (Israel's) lineage. Jesus, the Christ, descended from Jacob's son, Judah, whose mother is Jacob's wife, Leah. God opened Leah's womb because He saw that she was unloved by Jacob (Genesis 29:31). God not only blessed her by giving her children, but by having the Christ come through her lineage.
God did not use the lineage of the wife that Jacob loved to bring the Christ through, but He used the lineage of the wife that he did not love.
*Concubine - Female slave who functioned as a secondary wife and surrogate mother (biblestudytools.com).
Marriage Requirements for the People of God's Kingdom Under the Old Covenant
Observe what I command you this day. Behold, I am driving out from before you the Amorite and the Canaanite and the Hittite and the Perizzite and the Hivite and the Jebusite.Take heed to yourself, lest you make a covenant with the inhabitants of the land where you are going, lest it be a snare in your midst. But you shall destroy their altars, break their sacred pillars, and cut down their wooden images (for you shall worship no other god, for the Lord, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God), lest you make a covenant with the inhabitants of the land, and they play the harlot with their gods and make sacrifice to their gods, and one of them invites you and you eat of his sacrifice, and you take of his daughters for your sons, and his daughters play the harlot with their gods and make your sons play the harlot with their gods. - Exodus 34:11-16
“When the Lord your God brings you into the land which you go to possess, and has cast out many nations before you, the Hittites and the Girgashites and the Amorites and the Canaanites and the Perizzites and the Hivites and the Jebusites, seven nations greater and mightier than you, and when the Lord your God delivers them over to you, you shall conquer them and utterly destroy them.
You shall make no covenant with them nor show mercy to them. Nor shall you make marriages with them. You shall not give your daughter to their son, nor take their daughter for your son. For they will turn your sons away from following Me, to serve other gods; so the anger of the Lord will be aroused against you and destroy you suddenly.
But thus you shall deal with them: you shall destroy their altars, and break down their sacred pillars, and cut down their wooden images, and burn their carved images with fire. “For you are a holy people to the Lord your God; the Lord your God has chosen you to be a people for Himself, a special treasure above all the peoples on the face of the earth. - Deuteronomy 7:1-6
Israel were the people whom God had chosen and set apart for Himself as His kingdom, and they were to worship Him alone. Canaan was the region of land in which God was leading His people to conquer and dwell in. The people of Canaan were idolaters and were therefore wicked because they followed false gods. Because of their idolatry and wickedness, God judged Canaan by using His people to destroy them and take their land, where He would establish His kingdom. God knew that if His people intermarried with Canaan, they would be led away from Him and to worship false gods, and because He is a jealous God, He commanded them not to intermarry with them, but to destroy them. God equates idolatry with harlotry, and forbids His people to partake in either. God require(d)(s) His people to be different from the world, and to look to Him alone as their God.
“If brothers dwell together, and one of them dies and has no son, the widow of the dead man shall not be married to a stranger outside the family; her husband’s brother shall go in to her, take her as his wife, and perform the duty of a husband’s brother to her. - Deuteronomy 25:5
This command seems to be regardless of whether the surviving brother already has a wife or not. His duty as the husband's brother was to go into her and give her children in his brother's name. Again, it seems that "taking a wife" meant going into her; there was no formal wedding or vows or ceremony mentioned.
Sexual Morality Laws Given to the Kingdom of Israel
Then the Lord spoke to Moses, saying, “Speak to the children of Israel, and say to them: ‘I am the Lord your God. According to the doings of the land of Egypt, where you dwelt, you shall not do; and according to the doings of the land of Canaan, where I am bringing you, you shall not do; nor shall you walk in their ordinances.
You shall observe My judgments and keep My ordinances, to walk in them: I am the Lord your God. You shall therefore keep My statutes and My judgments, which if a man does, he shall live by them: I am the Lord.
None of you shall approach anyone who is near of kin to him, to uncover his nakedness: I am the Lord.
The nakedness of your father or the nakedness of your mother you shall not uncover. She is your mother; you shall not uncover her nakedness.
The nakedness of your father’s wife you shall not uncover; it is your father’s nakedness.
The nakedness of your sister, the daughter of your father, or the daughter of your mother, whether born at home or elsewhere, their nakedness you shall not uncover.
The nakedness of your son’s daughter or your daughter’s daughter, their nakedness you shall not uncover; for theirs is your own nakedness.
The nakedness of your father’s wife’s daughter, begotten by your father—she is your sister—you shall not uncover her nakedness.
You shall not uncover the nakedness of your father’s sister; she is near of kin to your father.
You shall not uncover the nakedness of your mother’s sister, for she is near of kin to your mother.
You shall not uncover the nakedness of your father’s brother. You shall not approach his wife; she is your aunt.
You shall not uncover the nakedness of your daughter-in-law—she is your son’s wife—you shall not uncover her nakedness.
You shall not uncover the nakedness of your brother’s wife; it is your brother’s nakedness.
You shall not uncover the nakedness of a woman and her daughter, nor shall you take her son’s daughter or her daughter’s daughter, to uncover her nakedness. They are near of kin to her. It is wickedness.
Nor shall you take a woman as a rival to her sister, to uncover her nakedness while the other is alive.
Also you shall not approach a woman to uncover her nakedness as long as she is in her customary impurity.
Moreover you shall not lie carnally with your neighbor’s wife, to defile yourself with her.
And you shall not let any of your descendants pass through the fire to Molech, nor shall you profane the name of your God: I am the Lord.
You shall not lie with a male as with a woman. It is an abomination.
Nor shall you mate with any animal, to defile yourself with it. Nor shall any woman stand before an animal to mate with it. It is perversion.
Do not defile yourselves with any of these things; for by all these the nations are defiled, which I am casting out before you. For the land is defiled; therefore I visit the punishment of its iniquity upon it, and the land vomits out its inhabitants.
You shall therefore keep My statutes and My judgments, and shall not commit any of these abominations, either any of your own nation or any stranger who dwells among you (for all these abominations the men of the land have done, who were before you, and thus the land is defiled), lest the land vomit you out also when you defile it, as it vomited out the nations that were before you.
For whoever commits any of these abominations, the persons who commit them shall be cut off from among their people.
Therefore you shall keep My ordinance, so that you do not commit any of these abominable customs which were committed before you, and that you do not defile yourselves by them: I am the Lord your God.’ ”
- Leviticus 18:1-30
Sexual morality laws given to the kingdom of Israel for both married and unmarried men and women. They are included in this article because they relate to marriage and still apply to God's people today even though they are not under the old covenant law. These laws, in part, define God's character and therefore, they are unchanging.
The man who commits adultery with another man’s wife, he who commits adultery with his neighbor’s wife, the adulterer and the adulteress, shall surely be put to death.
The man who lies with his father’s wife has uncovered his father’s nakedness; both of them shall surely be put to death. Their blood shall be upon them.
If a man lies with his daughter-in-law, both of them shall surely be put to death. They have committed perversion. Their blood shall be upon them.
If a man lies with a male as he lies with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination. They shall surely be put to death. Their blood shall be upon them.
If a man marries a woman and her mother, it is wickedness. They shall be burned with fire, both he and they, that there may be no wickedness among you.
If a man mates with an animal, he shall surely be put to death, and you shall kill the animal.
If a woman approaches any animal and mates with it, you shall kill the woman and the animal. They shall surely be put to death. Their blood is upon them.
If a man takes his sister, his father’s daughter or his mother’s daughter, and sees her nakedness and she sees his nakedness, it is a wicked thing. And they shall be cut off in the sight of their people. He has uncovered his sister’s nakedness. He shall bear his guilt.
If a man lies with a woman during her sickness and uncovers her nakedness, he has exposed her flow, and she has uncovered the flow of her blood. Both of them shall be cut off from their people.
You shall not uncover the nakedness of your mother’s sister nor of your father’s sister, for that would uncover his near of kin. They shall bear their guilt.
If a man lies with his uncle’s wife, he has uncovered his uncle’s nakedness. They shall bear their sin; they shall die childless.
If a man takes his brother’s wife, it is an unclean thing. He has uncovered his brother’s nakedness. They shall be childless.
You shall therefore keep all My statutes and all My judgments, and perform them, that the land where I am bringing you to dwell may not vomit you out. And you shall not walk in the statutes of the nation which I am casting out before you; for they commit all these things, and therefore I abhor them. But I have said to you, “You shall inherit their land, and I will give it to you to possess, a land flowing with milk and honey.” I am the Lord your God, who has separated you from the peoples.
- Leviticus 20:10-24
Penalties for the kingdom of Israel for committing sexual immorality.They are included because they relate to marriage, although they do not apply to God's people today. These were part of the law which God's people used to govern the kingdom under the old covenant. Under the new covenant, Christ is the head (leader, king) of His people and the judge of their sin, not man. Christ will determine what their penalty is based on their sin, not us.
You shall have no other gods before Me.
You shall not make for yourself a carved image—any likeness of anything that is in heaven above, or that is in the earth beneath, or that is in the water under the earth; you shall not bow down to them nor serve them. For I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God, visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children to the third and fourth generations of those who hate Me,
You shall not commit adultery.
You shall not covet your neighbor’s house; you shall not covet your neighbor’s wife, nor his male servant, nor his female servant, nor his ox, nor his donkey, nor anything that is your neighbor’s.”
- Exodus 20:3-5, 14, 17
Commands to the kingdom of Israel regarding idolatry, adultery and covetousness. Included because they relate to marriage and still apply to God's people today even though they are not under the law of the old covenant. These commands, in part, define God's character, and therefore they are unchanging. They also provide some of the moral standards that He requires of His people which set them apart from the world.
“When a man takes a wife and marries her, and it happens that she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some uncleanness in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, puts it in her hand, and sends her out of his house, when she has departed from his house, and goes and becomes another man’s wife, if the latter husband detests her and writes her a certificate of divorce, puts it in her hand, and sends her out of his house, or if the latter husband dies who took her as his wife, then her former husband who divorced her must not take her back to be his wife after she has been defiled; for that is an abomination before the Lord, and you shall not bring sin on the land which the Lord your God is giving you as an inheritance.
When a man has taken a new wife, he shall not go out to war or be charged with any business; he shall be free at home one year, and bring happiness to his wife whom he has taken.
- Deuteronomy 24:1-5
I'm uncertain of what the "uncleanness" is that is referred to that would allow a man to divorce his wife, (perhaps relating to idolatry or unfaithfulness to the marriage, to God, or to God's law) but her being with another man has defiled her because a marriage is consummated by the man going into the woman. The act of sex is what binds them together as one unit.
It is an abomination to God if the first husband takes back the wife after she has been defiled by sexually being with another man because as we see from the ancient forefathers and learn in the New Testament, sex joins two people together, which is the definition of marriage. For the first man to take his wife back after she had been defiled would bring sin upon the land which God was giving to His people as an inheritance, the land in which His kingdom would be established.
Men were required to stay home from war and from doing business for one year after taking a new wife so that he could bring happiness to her, which probably included getting her pregnant in order to multiply Godly offspring that would increase His kingdom.
When the Lord began to speak by Hosea, the Lord said to Hosea: “Go, take yourself a wife of harlotry and children of harlotry, for the land has committed great harlotry by departing from the Lord.” - Hosea 1:2
Then the Lord said to me, “Go again, love a woman who is loved by a lover and is committing adultery, just like the love of the Lord for the children of Israel, who look to other gods and love the raisin cakes of the pagans.”
So I bought her for myself for fifteen shekels of silver, and one and one-half homers of barley. And I said to her, “You shall stay with me many days; you shall not play the harlot, nor shall you have a man—so, too, will I be toward you.” - Hosea 3:1-3
God commanded one of His prophets to take a harlot and an adulterer for a wife in order to literally show Israel that they were playing the harlot by committing adultery against Him by engaging in idolatry and forsaking Him. This is a nontypical marriage for a person who belongs to God, but we cannot assume that God would not call one of His people today to marry a harlot in order to fulfill His own purposes. If we are serving God, we have to remember that we were bought at a price and that our lives are not our own, meaning that God may have us do things that do not make us happy or comfortable. The life of one who is in the kingdom of God is not at all about happiness and comfort, but about pleasing God and fulfilling His purposes.
Judah has dealt treacherously, And an abomination has been committed in Israel and in Jerusalem, For Judah has profaned The Lord’s holy institution which He loves: He has married the daughter of a foreign god.
May the Lord cut off from the tents of Jacob The man who does this, being awake and aware, Yet who brings an offering to the Lord of hosts!
And this is the second thing you do: You cover the altar of the Lord with tears, With weeping and crying; So He does not regard the offering anymore, Nor receive it with goodwill from your hands.
Yet you say, “For what reason?” Because the Lord has been witness Between you and the wife of your youth, With whom you have dealt treacherously; Yet she is your companion And your wife by covenant.
But did He not make them one, Having a remnant of the Spirit? And why one? He seeks godly offspring. Therefore take heed to your spirit, And let none deal treacherously with the wife of his youth.
“For the Lord God of Israel says That He hates divorce, For it covers one’s garment with violence,” Says the Lord of hosts. “Therefore take heed to your spirit, That you do not deal treacherously.”
- Malachi 2:11-16
God loves the institution of marriage and hates divorce. Judah was divorcing their wives on unproper grounds, and marrying women of foreign gods - women who were not of Israel. He calls their actions treachery, and an abomination, and said that they had profaned the institution of marriage which He loves. He said that the husband and wife are bound by a covenant, and that they are united as one for the purpose of producing Godly offspring, therefore He commanded them not to deal treacherously with their wives by breaking their covenant with them and marrying foreign women who were idolaters.
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